Gawd

Blazer Manpurse has never been a slave to fashion, kay? I have a BFA, but I don’t wear those dumb ’70s glasses, I don’t own any soccer shoes. And I certainly know better than to pull something like this:

Ogilve 2

This reminds me of that really skanky, over the hill lady at a party who mourns the loss of hotness with rub-on tanning cream, a conspicuous thong, and several pounds of “funky jewelry.” If this building was a famous actress, I’d have to send her to my new favorite web site for a much-deserved bitchslap.

Plus, if you squint really hard, it looks like it says “Oligarchy.”

Moving along, thanks to everyone who mouthed off at our recent “new slogan for Durham” contest. Our expert panel of cranks and substance abusers has determined the winner, submitted by the entity known only as Dead Bastard. It reads thusly:

Durham-not as scary if you’re drunk

We couldn’t agree more. The aforementioned illegitimate corpse will receive the promised “fabulous doodad,” a key fob with a difference:

Pink key fob

Thanks for playing, and look for more pointless, snarky contests soon.

And for god’s sake, keep buying real estate!

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6 Responses to Gawd

  1. Sonja Foust says:

    So I’ve been wondering for about a week, since they put that sign up: What exactly DOES it say?

  2. Blazer Manpurse, BFA says:

    It says “font that looked stupid in the ’80s too.”

  3. Uncle Mike says:

    Hey there Blazer, you may not “wear those dumb 70’s glasses” now, but by god you used to, and I have evidence to prove it.

    As to “Oligarchy” I’d say a junta is in order.

  4. toieshat says:

    I drive past that sign everyday, and I still don’t know what it says. It looks about as out of place as the Cow Store would look next to the Bellagio. (Actually, Blazer, you’re good at Photoshop; I’d love to see the Cow Store next store to the Bellagio, although, in Vegas, I suppose it might not look so out of the ordinary).

  5. Dead Bastard says:

    I’d like to thank the Academy. At long last, I’ll finally find out what a “fob” is.

  6. Blazer Manpurse, BFA says:

    A key fob is a medallion used to identify a key ring or used as a starting place on a ring, frequently given as an advertising item.

    FOB (or F.O.B.) may also be an acronym meaning:
    Fall Out Boy
    Fecal Occult Blood
    Fetal osteoblast progenitor cell
    Fruit On Barbecue
    Friend of Bill, a follower of Alcoholics Anonymous and its founder, Bill W.
    Friend (or Friends) of Bill Clinton

    Thank you, Wiki-frickin’-pedia

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